Understanding
by iheartplatypus
Summary: Set between the 3 year gap as we view the point of views through Asami and Korra's eyes. Continuing this. Will be updated probably every other week. (hopefully!)
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. They belong to Bryke.**

**(See more info at the end for author's notes.)**

"Get well soon, Korra," she softly whispered to herself as she slowly put her head down on her messy desk riddled with projects of massive structures.

Asami could barely sleep, could barely think, and could barely eat; however, the thought of Korra had kept her at ease. She had been swamped with projects here and there on rebuilding Republic City into a better place—she needed something else to think about. The only thing on her mind was the last farewell she said to Korra.

"Goodbye Korra!" she remembered what she had said. As well as a "I'll miss you" under her breath.

She let out a huge sigh as she shook her head, trying to stop from remembering any further. If only, if only… She had only wished she had taken care of her.

"It's for the best that she figures herself out first. I shouldn't be so selfish—besides, I need to get these projects done so that the people… And Korra would be proud of me," she told herself.

She shook her head at the various ways she could tell her feelings for Korra once she comes back to Republic City, but none of them felt appropriate at the moment. Especially since the trauma the Avatar had gone through. The engineer went back onto her duties and planned on finishing one more project… And possibly a letter before she went to sleep.

—-

"Dear Korra, I miss you! It's not the same in Republic City without you. How are you feeling? Things are going well here. I just got a big contract to help redesign the city's infrastructure, so I'll be keeping pretty busy for a while."

Korra read her dear friend's letter as well as many other heartfelt letters. But for some reason, this letter from Asami struck her the most.

"I wish I could say the same, Asami. But nothing I ever do is right…" Korra buried her face in her hands and let out a sad groan.

_Why can't I be well already! I want to get back in the action and save people! The people need me… But I can't even help myself…_

She let out a soft cry. The Avatar wasn't sure if she needed comfort from people after reading such wonderful letters. But she knew she couldn't face them. Especially not in the condition she's in.

_It's already been a while and I still haven't recovered? Why do I have to go through this? Why, why, why!_

She wished that she could spew all her feelings to someone, but she wasn't sure who. Nor could she say how she actually felt about her condition. There was just too much going on within her.

The Avatar let out an uneasy sigh. She couldn't handle being alone but at the same time, she knew she couldn't show her tragic self to the world just yet. She was too vulnerable and too scared for people to understand her.

_Maybe Asami… Maybe she'll listen to me._

Korra grabbed a pen and scribbled some words on a piece of paper. She scribbled, crumpled, and rewrote and scribbled, crumpled, and rewrote until she gave up trying to rewrite the letter to Asami. Korra decided to write whatever came to mind, instead. She poured out her heart on a new piece of paper, hoping that she made sense of what she was saying so that Asami could understand.

_Please understand…_ Korra kept repeating to herself.

As she wrote the last few words of her letter, she had second thoughts about just throwing it all away. But for some reason… For some odd reason, Korra felt the need to send this letter to Asami. And only to Asami. This puzzled her, but Korra immediately decided to think about it over and over. It's probably the amount of noodles she ate that's been making her crazy.

_No, no._ She disagreed with herself. _I feel like there's something… Something I'm not understanding here._

Korra walked to her somewhat comfy bed and plopped herself face-down with her face on her pillow. She made a disgruntled look and was so confused of what she was feeling at the moment.

_I mean, come on. We're just friends. But why do I get the feeling that she's the only one who really understands me?_

She looked back into her memories and let out her trademark crooked grin. The day she met Asami was the day she wanted to roll her eyes into a different dimension. She giggled. How things have definitely changed. Korra started reminiscing the first few moments. Granted, they weren't really nice since the Avatar was "in love" with Mako, but Korra started understanding that her friendship with Asami was definitely different. Every moment she spent with Asami was always a rejuvenating experience. From the time when Asami taught her how to drive to the time when she lifted Mako into the air with her airbending which made Asami laugh to the time when they were kicking some bandits' asses and many more memories.

But there was a certain memory she overlooked. A certain memory that felt really fuzzy. It was before Jinora's ceremony and Korra really tried to remember what had happened that day.

"Nobody expects you to bounce back right away," she remembered vaguely of what Asami had said as well as some other words of encouragement... But this-this had struck her just now. Korra didn't realize how genuinely thoughtful Asami was. Well, she knew that Asami was one of the most caring friends she has. But it was something about that sentence that made her feel… Understood. Korra's heart leapt. And it was a very different, yet great feeling.

_What does this all mean?_ She tried to figure out what was happening. But more importantly, she was trying really hard to remember what her best friend had said to her.

"…I'm here for you if you ever want to talk, or anything…"

She remembered now. She remembered how much Asami had cared. She even remembered the way Asami's eyes fell when she had said, "or anything." Korra gently punched her head and made a face of which said, "wow, I'm a huge idiot."

It was just so hazy to her. But Korra remembered that she couldn't really comprehend what was going on at the time since there were too many depressing thoughts filling up her brain. She felt guilty that she just realized what Asami said and meant until now.

_I'm such an idiot. How could I have not seen that?_

Suddenly, a rush of emotions stirred within Korra's heart. She felt so confused, but also happy, guilty, sad, mad, and probably—

_No, that can't be. I mean, we're just friends. She probably doesn't feel the same way as me._

But did it really look like that from the surface? Was there truly something more? What did this all mean?

She felt like ripping her pillow apart from the frustration and realization of her feelings. Her heart leapt over and over as if she were falling in—

_No, no, no._ She shook her head. _No, no, no. I'm pretty sure we're just really good friends. There can't be anything more._

Korra just sighed, but it didn't really help her situation. She still felt her heart melting and her thoughts racing. All she could do now is lock up her feelings.

_But what if…_ She paused. _What if she actually feels the same way?_

She let out a groan of frustration and threw her fists at the sky. If only had she had known sooner. Korra kept flopping about on her bed when exhaustion ran through her body.  
"I probably shouldn't get too overworked on this. But I do know one thing." She stared at the ceiling and breathed deeply.

"I think… I think I lov—"

She shook her head, walked back to her desk, and sealed the letter that she had written earlier. She was too tired to think of anything else and finally went back to bed.

"I hope she's alright," she whispered softly as she closed her eyes.

—

Author's notes: This is my first fic for this ship and my god, I'm a terrible writer. But I felt like writing about how they felt in their absence. Granted, I can't really explain well nor am I good with portraying their personalities correctly, but it was something I wanted to write since I love them so much.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's notes: Thank you all so much for your responses! I'm still trying to understand how to visually piece the 3 year gap together. I apologize for any mistakes on my part. Also, the previous chapter happened a few months before Korra wrote her own letter to Asami. If there needs to be any clarification, please feel free to add your thoughts. Thank you for reading. I will try my best to update this probably every week or every other week.**

Asami looked out President Raiko's window. Today was the middle of the month which is when they usually set up their meetings to discuss their plans on reconstructions. He was muttering some words, but she certainly wasn't paying attention to most of what he was saying. Instead, the hopeful engineer observed the recent construction happening around Republic City.

It had been two years since Korra left and Asami felt that Republic City was taking shape. But there was one project that she was eager for her friend to see once she comes back.

_I hope Korra enjoys the park I built for her,_ she sighed happily. _She deserves all the recognition for what she went through and how much she's helped shape the world. Welcoming new airbenders, uniting the spirit world with the material world… _But then Asami remembered what also happened. She remembered the awful day that the Avatar fought with Zaheer; the day that Asami had realized that if Korra was indeed gone from this earth, Asami's heart wouldn't take it; and also the day that she fully recognized her truest feelings for Korra.

_I hope you're feeling better. Just.. _she thought to herself. _Just get well soon, okay?_ She looked down at what was a makeshift statue of an eventual Korra. It gave Asami hope that when all of this construction would finish, she would ultimately have the courage to tell Korra her true feelings.

_I'll wait. No matter how long it takes. Just get well soon and focus on yourself. But I just wish you would tell me how you're doing. It'd be nice to at least hear from you._

Asami wiped a small tear that was about to roll down her cheek.

"Asami, are you listening to me?" President Raiko snapped her out of her line of thinking.

"Oh-Oh! I'm quite sorry, President Raiko.. It's just-"

"Are you okay? Did you need some time off from working on the projects?"

"Spirits no! I'm fine. I just had some thoughts about the Avatar and what her current status is."

"Well, if you only paid attention to me, you would have heard that I just received a message from Korra that was for your eyes only."

"Wait… From Korra? Why was the letter sent to you?"

"Well, it was probably the fact that you were working too hard on your projects that one of my advisors went to check up on you. One of them noticed that your mailbox was full and decided to hand it to you, but you declined. You probably weren't given the details of what was in the mail that you were about to recieve. I know this might sound odd, but they decided to deliver it to me so that I may give it to you."

"Very odd indeed, but I'm very grateful for you to do this. I stopped checking my mailbox last month because I wasn't sure if I was going to get any response from… our Avatar."

"Ah, don't worry," President Raiko shuffled through his desk trying to find out where the letter was hidden, "A-ha! here it is. It's only a week old from when it was sent to your house. Here you go."

Raiko handed her the unopened letter and Asami gave a little bow.

"Thank you sir. Now, I'll be on my wa-"

"Ah, ah, ah. Ms. Sato, I want you to think about what I said."

"Erm- come again?" the genius blushed. "I'm sorry I haven't been myself the past few days, so I might have not heard every word you said."

Raiko rolled his eyes and said, "Just go take a break Ms. Sato and work on your projects when you're in good health. Also make sure to read what Avatar Korra sent you."

"Th-thank you sir! I'll definitely make it up to you."

"Yeah, yeah. Now run along and please take care of yourself."

"I will!" Asami's shout trailed off as she ran out the president's office. She was too excited to understand what was going on. All she could think of was what was in Korra's letter…

――――

Asami quickly arrived to her room and quietly sealed the door shut. She looked down onto the letter that was intended for her and it made her heart flutter.

She opened the week-old letter and took a giant breath. She unfolded the pages and read on.

"Dear Asami, I'm sorry I haven't written to you sooner, but every time I've tried, I never knew what to say. The past two years have been the hardest of my life. Even though I can get around just fine now, I still can't go into the Avatar State. I keep having visions of Zaheer, and what happened that day. Katara thinks a lot of this is in my head, so I've been meditating a lot, but sometimes I worry that I'll never fully recover. Please don't tell Mako and Bolin I wrote to you and not them. I don't want to hurt their feelings, but it's easier to tell you about this stuff. I don't think they'd understand…"

The note ended there without any warning, but the fact that Korra finally sent her a letter all these years had brought tears upon Asami's eyes. Nonetheless, this letter was only addressed for Asami. She felt a rush of emotions: joy, sadness, sympathy, compassion, but mostly worry. She worried so much that her heart was about to explode and she wanted to see Korra now. But she knew that she couldn't throw herself upon Korra. She knew that Korra's recovery was more important than anything. But Asami felt like being a part of her recovery… She wanted her to get better as soon as she can. But she knew in her heart that all she could do for Korra was be there for her. She couldn't fully understand how it must have felt when the Avatar was faced with not only Zaheer, but also the events leading up to Zaheer: the burden of becoming the Avatar, being a world leader, facing other enemies such as Amon and Unalaq, being the bridge between the spirits and the people…

_Asami! Get it together. You need to be strong for Korra. _

She knew her conscience was right. Korra had been so strong for everyone that the turmoil that she went through had a giant toll on her recovery process. Asami wiped her eyes and patted her face in order to snap back into reality.

_Just be patient, Asami. _

But how could she? She was so worried for her _friend_, the one she loved so dearly. No, she wasn't just a friend. Korra was more than that, but she knew that she didn't want to burden Korra with her feelings. But when Asami kept these feelings in her chest, the pain started to swell. Waiting and waiting kept her up at night, so she drowned herself upon projects and projects in order to mute that pain. She even wrote letters that she was too reluctant to send because she felt that she was either getting too hasty or―dare she say―clingy for her. Asami valued Korra's personal space. She knew that the Avatar was just as human as she was.

_What am I going to do? Do I just keep waiting? _

She felt like going to the Southern Water Tribe, running into Korra's bedroom, and holding Korra in her arms. However, Asami just let out a big sigh of uneasiness and desperation.

_No. Asami, just be strong. You've got to help shape this world, too. It's what Korra would have wanted. _

She jumped onto her own bed and stayed slumped on it for a while. She then figured that it would be best to stay strong.

_For her. It's for her. _

Exhaustion caught onto Asami's eyes and she eventually fell into a deep sleep that was long deserved.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Notes: Hello everybody! I wanted to let you know, there will be a lot of quoting from Book 4 Episode 2, "Korra Alone." I know the dialogue is not original and that I don't want to merely plagiarize their words, but I really wanted to tie this in together as much as I can. Thank you for reading! Enjoy! (Also, have you seen the amazing artwork by Bryan K.? It's so wonderful that he released official art for Korrasami! Yay!)**

It was a new day. Another dreaded day. Peering through the curtains was the sunlight that hit Korra's eyes. She groaned and finally gave up on the small amounts of sleep she had from last night's thinking.

"... Be grateful for where you are now and the progress that you made…" Tenzin's words echoed through and through Korra's brain.

_What progress? I've just now been able to walk properly and finally use my bending after 2 years. What kind of progress is that? And the world? How is the world doing without me? How am I supposed to be some renowned Avatar that's meant to bring balance to the world?_

She didn't want to have these thoughts so early in the morning when she already spent time mulling over it just a few hours ago. But she couldn't help but think that she had been a failure to the world. She was merely one Avatar…

_Maybe I'm just not cut out for this. _

She shook her head and knew that she couldn't just throw it all away. It was her duty to balance good and evil throughout the nations.

Korra sighed, looked at Naga, and gave her a big hug. "I hope you believe in me too, girl," she said with a weak smile.

Korra walked out of her bed and started walking into the dining room of her home. Senna and Tonraq were discussing something quietly, but Korra wasn't paying attention. Her eyes looked so saddened and didn't meet their gaze. Worried about Korra's expression, Senna rushed over to give Korra a giant, warm embrace.

"Thanks, mom," Korra said softly and sincerely. She knew she needed one.

"Of course, honey. All we want is for you to get better."

Senna guided her to her seat. They all sat down and started eating, but the awkward silence filled the air.

"So, how have you been today?" Tonraq asked his daughter. He knew that she had been hurting and all he wanted to do was care for her, but Korra was so hard to talk to the past few years. As a father, he felt ashamed that he couldn't do anything, but he let Korra do whatever was best for her.

"I'm doing a little bit better, Dad." She gave him a weak smile and went back to playing with her food.

_Probably, it's best if I leave here. Probably, it's best that I get some fresh air… Or I should probably head back to Republic City and see how everyone's doing... _

Korra paused and hesitated.

_Should I head back? I mean, it's better than standing around here and doing nothing. Training hasn't gotten me anywhere either. _

At that moment, an image popped in her head-it was Team Avatar. The memories of them together brought more sadness in Korra's mind. She wanted to be with them again. All the laughs, the fights, and the triumphs they shared together was something she hadn't thought about in quite a while. But most importantly… She also wanted to know how Asami was doing. Mako and Bolin were friends with Korra first, but before she headed out to the Southern Water Tribe, she had spent so much time with Asami. Sadly, it was only last night that she remembered that Asami had taken care of her before and after Jinora's ceremony. The fuzzy memories of her only girl friend were very calming and sentimental. It embarrassed Korra when she finally noticed her sudden realization of her feelings for Asami. However, this small spark that she felt for her made her feel at ease and also, uneasy. She wasn't sure of it yet, but all she knew was she had missed her friend all these years and never got the chance to understand the things her friend has done for her.

_Ugh, I thought I was going to stop thinking about this. I'm just going to keep getting frustrated. On top of that, I have to worry about my condition... Why is this such a pain?_

It had been a week since she sent a response to Asami. She wasn't expecting a letter from her right away, or at all for that matter. But Korra felt that it was a relief to tell someone how she felt about the whole mess that's been happening. She knew Asami would be the only one to understand.

_Maybe it's best if I go to Republic City. And maybe I might even..._

"Everything alright, sweetie?" Senna asked.

"There's something I need to tell you both," the Avatar said abruptly.

"What is it?" Tonraq questioned her with a very concerned face.

"I want to go back to Republic City."

Senna looked at her with apprehension and felt that she wasn't ready to head back. But she knew that if that's what it would take for her to recover, then she understood that it was for her daughter's sake. "Are you sure?" she wanted to reassure Korra of her decision.

"I know I'm not one-hundred percent, yet. But I feel like I've hit a wall. I need to be where the action is." Korra looked up and brightened up a bit and said, "where my friends are."

The two parents glanced at each other with deep concern, then at Korra who had a small smile on her face.

"I'll have the White Lotus prepare us a boat and they can take you to Republic City as soon as you're ready," Tonraq suggested.

"No, I want to go alone… I'll have some time to clear my head. It'll be good for me."

Even though they weren't ready to have their only daughter alone on a journey, they agreed that Korra was responsible for her decision.

"Alright, dear. Please, be extra careful. However, if you think that it may be too much for you, please, come back home." Senna whispered gently.

"I will." Korra shot up and felt a rush of energy. She was about to run out of the dining room, but her father grabbed her arm and said, "We'll do this first thing tomorrow. For now, get some rest."

Her eyes fell, but she knew that her dad was right. He let go of her arm and Korra agreed with a nod.

"I'll just go outside for a bit and play with Naga before I head out tomorrow."

"You won't be taking her?" Tonraq looked puzzled.

"No, I think it'd be best for me to travel alone without any distractions."

"If that's what you want. Make sure you give her the biggest hug before you venture off on your journey."

"Thanks, dad. and mom. I want to be able to get better, and I feel like this will help me understand who I am and what I'm supposed to do." Her crooked smile radiated through the room with such ambition and desire to get better that her mother started to whimper.

"Korra, I haven't seen you this eager. I hope you made the right decision," Senna ran up to her and embraced her. Tonraq followed as well. Korra couldn't help but feel the love from them both. Even though she wasn't able to share everything with them, she knew they loved her dearly. She shed a tear and started to pull away from their embrace.

"I love you mom and dad," Korra wiped away a tear.

"We love you too, dear." Her parents wrapped their arms around her one more time before she decided to go outside for some fresh air.

Korra walked out of her home and into the barren, snowfield. It felt a chillier today, so she decided to wear her navy blue parka and some toasty mittens. Naga dashed out and tackled the Avatar into the snow. The sappy Avatar let out a thunderous laugh―a genuine one at that―and started petting her polar-bear dog. It had been such a long time since she felt such positive emotions all in one day, minus the negativity early in the morning. But what confused her was the sudden burst of excitement. Was it because she was secretly excited to see her friends again? Or more importantly... Asami? Was that really the case here?

"Naga, do you like Asami?" Korra asked her four-legged companion.

Naga shot up at the word, "Asami," barked in agreement, and started running around in search of her. Unfortunately, Naga saw no sign of her around and sadly laid her head down in her paws.

"You miss her too, huh, girl?" Korra's temporary happiness faded into a sudden melancholy. She didn't want the feelings that she felt earlier to turn into a sense of uneasiness. The young woman stood up and started to have a mini-tantrum.

_Why am I hurting so much yet feel giddy when I think of you?! You didn't do anything wrong to me but, Spirits, it hurts so much. The worse part is I don't even know how you feel about me and if all these signals between us might not be what it seems. Why is this taking such a toll on me? Why do I want to be there with you so badly?! Why is it now that I just realized this?! _

Passion and frustration filled Korra's heart. She started to stomp the ground, but Naga came in and calmed her down by gently nudging her. Korra sighed and gave Naga a pat on her nose.

"You're right, Naga. I should calm down and think things through. I'm not sure what's causing this unexpected happiness, but all I know is that I want it. I'll pursue the answers and see what will happen." Korra paused to think to herself. _Will I be able to understand what's going on my heart? Probably not, but the main point here is that I need to get better. I need to get better so I can see her and tell her the things I wasn't able to say. _

Naga tugged on the pondering girl's parka as a gesture to play with her. The Avatar cracked a tiny smile and exhaled the anxiety pent up in her heart. For now, she realized that she needed time away from everything, so this last playtime with Naga would cheer her up.


End file.
